The freedom of forgiveness 

Fr. Seb explores the deep connection between God’s forgiveness and our forgiveness of others, drawing on Romans, the parable of the unforgiving servant, and the life of St Francis. This sermon draws from the Gospel of Matthew, Chapter 18, Verses 21 to 35.

Whilst I tend to be more of a Choral Eucharist/Choral Matins kind of guy there is a contemporary Christian song called ‘Brother’ which I’ve always found very beautiful. Some of the lyrics are as follows:

Forgiveness is the garment of our courage. The power to make the peace we long to know. Open up our eyes to see the wounds that bind all of humankind. May our shutter hearts greet the dawn of life with charity and love.
 
Beautiful. It gives me goosebumps – probably because it touches with such rawness and poetry that most difficult and essential of things: forgiveness. Forgiveness, if we are being honest with ourselves, can be a tricky thing. We love to be forgiven – we might even enjoy idealising the idea of forgiveness – but truly forgiving others can be a very difficult and complicated matter. There’s something about us humans whereby we like to hold onto anger, resentment, and even hatred. We can find it so hard to let these things go.
 
Yet here’s the thing: the Bible draws a clear correlation between God’s forgiveness of us and our forgiveness of others. In the Gospel we heard that parable about the man who himself has been forgiven for his many debts by his master whilst strangling those under him for their lesser debts, which is met with distress and outrage. You see the correlation.
 
Turn to our reading from Paul’s letter to the Romans. Paul writes:
 
We do not live to ourselves, and we do not die to ourselves. If we live, we live to the Lord, and if we die, we die to the Lord; so then, whether we live or whether we die, we are the Lord’s.
 
This highlights a great spiritual truth which can utterly shock modern ears: our lives are not about us. My life is not about me. Your life is not about you. Within an individualistic framework this can feel very difficult to hear. But for the Christian our lives are not about us – they are about God. We live and we die for the Lord.
 
What I’m wanting to suggest is that when this great truth sinks in, we become able to truly forgive. The inability to forgive can arise from a locked in view that our life is all about ourselves – our compromised dignity/our violated rights and so on.  
 
But when you realize that your life is not about you but rather that everything you are and have comes as a gift from God, you realize that you are here simply to be an instrument for God’s grace. You exist to be a channel for God’s peace. And that shift makes real forgiveness – and indeed real peace – possible.
 
Without that shift we will likely become trapped in our own pursuit for justice, in our own sense of entitlement, and our egotistical preoccupations. But when our forgiveness of others is seen in relation to God’s forgiveness of us, we can truly forgive and make way for peace. Our lives belong not to ourselves but to God.
 
As you may know Mariann and I just got back from a short break in Assisi – famous of course for St Francis and St Clare. Feeling re-inspired by the saints of Assisi I’ll try and not mention them in every sermon I give for the next few months, but just one brief reflection from the life of St Francis.
 
Before Francis’ conversion where he subsequently gave his entire life to the service of Christ he – like most others – felt deeply repulsed by those with leprosy, which was a common problem back then. He described the sight of them as bitter and unbearable. It might seem strange to us but in a medieval context with such strong societal divides he would have felt offended and violated by the sight of them, as though by merely existing they had done him some wrong.
 
After his famous conversion at San Damiano, and the shift in understanding that his life was not his but God’s, Francis would famously later embrace, touch, and tend to the soars of those with leprosy. As he put it, what had seemed bitter changed into sweetness of body and soul. In other words, pardon, forgiveness, and peace.
 
How often should we forgive another? As many as seven times? Jesus says, ‘Not seven times, but, I tell you, seventy – seven times. We are to always forgive. We are to always live in a spirit of generosity and grace. How did Francis forgive and embrace those whose mere existence had once caused him to feel offended? He realized that his life was not about him but instead saw an opportunity for grace and to be a channel for God’s peace – that peace we each long to know.
 
Let me draw this reflection to a close with a few practical ways in which we can all become better forgivers. First be conscious of your own sinful nature. If we do so we will likely realize how we have been forgiven far more than we have been offended. When we call to mind our sins and receive absolution, as we do when we gather together in worship, I encourage you to really engage with that. In that moment really call to mind your sins trusting in the Lord’s forgiveness.
 
Second, slow down the Lord’s Prayer. Especially mull over the part that says ‘forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us’. We ask for God’s forgiveness in so much as we become forgivers of others.
 
Third, make use of Confession. I make use of the sacrament of Confession, and I can tell you it is wonderfully liberating to hear the words of Christ, ‘I absolve you from all your sins’. When we seek the Lord’s forgiveness by recognizing our own sinfulness we ourselves can become better at forgiving others.
 
And if you are interested in the sacrament of Confession then please do speak to me. I’ve sometimes thought about making a regular slot in the week for simply being present in church where I am available to listen, have pastoral conversations, and should you wish, hear Confession.
 
So may we remember that our lives are not our own but belong to God. Forgiven by him, may we become people who forgive; letting go of resentment, making room for grace, and becoming channels of the peace we ourselves long to know.
Amen